Review of the Samsung Galaxy S4, by an iPhone User
May 20, 2013 08:57
| Permalink
I am an admitted Apple fangurl. I was an early, enthralled iPhone adopter. I went to the Apple Store within the first week of the iPhone's introduction, stood in line, and lovingly brought home the wondrous creature.
But of late, all these years later, I found myself increasingly interested in the flexibility of the Android ecosystem. One of my friends has a Galaxy S3 and I had serious screen envy--my goodness, that screen is luscious!
I also haven't been wowed by the latest iPhone offerings. Yawn.
So last week, when my iPhone 4 was taken over by aliens and the iPod app wouldn't let me dial out, I went to AT&T and cashed in my upgrade for a Samsung Galaxy S4. I've been playing with it for almost a week, so here's the review, and my thoughts on it from negative to positive.
The really awful: There are two really terrible qualities. I mean, really awful.
One, the mail client is god-awful bad horrible. I guess this is android-wide and not specific to the Galaxy. But after the iOs mail client, the android mail client is clunky, unreadable, and confusing. It's not just bad, it's terrible--I can't emphasize this strongly enough. It doesn't sync often enough and the UI is impenetrable. I tried downloading another android mail client called K9 and I'm not impressed with it, either.
Any iPhone user will miss the ease and simplicity--both visual and intuitive--of the iOs mail client. This, in fact, may send me back to exchange the Galaxy for an iPhone 5. I check my email via my phone all the time.
Two, the Samsung OS takes up 8 gigabytes of space. Yes, 8. EIGHT. I purchased a 16 gig phone thinking I had 13 gigs of space, and to my surprise, NOPE. Only 8.
The bad: Three more issues.
One, there is too much stuff on the Galaxy. Too much software doing too many things. Hello, Samsung: SOMETIMES LESS IS MORE! Sheesh, you guys. Strip down this OS and your customers will be happier. It took me two days to figure out what I was going to use and what I wouldn't. Then another day to get rid of or hide the bloatware.
Two, the plastic casing feels cheap and flimsy in the hand. It just doesn't feel solid, and an iPhone user will miss the sturdy feeling in the hand. I walked by another AT&T store the other day so I checked out the HTC One, which has a really respectable aluminum casing.
Three, the settings are insanely disorganized. You will figure them out. It just won't be easy or intuitive. I am guessing that someone without the capacity for executive functioning in their brain designed the settings menus.
Here's what is neither positive or negative: so far I haven't noticed any extra flexibility from being in the android environment. It's just different.
Now, the good. There are a lot of good features.
One, the camera is fantastic. Awesome, actually--dazzling. Wish I used it more!
Two, customizing ringtones is easy and built-in. This is a great feature for me, because I like to customize ringtones. I like to know who is calling me so I can decide whether or not to pick up. I am actually trying to train people to text me as a first contact. At least 50% of all phone conversations can be conducted more efficiently via text. So I want to know who's calling, and for that I need specific ringtones. I always pick-up for my daughter's school, for example.
Three, customizing the lock and home screens is easy and fun. But you do have to get rid of some of that terrible bloatware that Samsung features--like Flipboard.
Four, air wave is kinda cool. I do like being able to wave my hand over the phone and see the time, date, and my unread email count. Nice feature.
The great.
One, the screen is fantastic. You have to see it to believe it. That big, bright screen makes reading texts easy. It makes looking at anything easy.
Two, I like the bigger size of the phone. I would have liked Apple to make an iPhone that was the same size. Really, I would have.
I have a few more days left to exchange the phone for a $35 restocking fee. In the end, it may just come down to that terrible android email interface--I don't know if I can live with it.
But the Samsung Galaxy S4 does feature many cool, worthwhile features.
But of late, all these years later, I found myself increasingly interested in the flexibility of the Android ecosystem. One of my friends has a Galaxy S3 and I had serious screen envy--my goodness, that screen is luscious!
I also haven't been wowed by the latest iPhone offerings. Yawn.
So last week, when my iPhone 4 was taken over by aliens and the iPod app wouldn't let me dial out, I went to AT&T and cashed in my upgrade for a Samsung Galaxy S4. I've been playing with it for almost a week, so here's the review, and my thoughts on it from negative to positive.
The really awful: There are two really terrible qualities. I mean, really awful.
One, the mail client is god-awful bad horrible. I guess this is android-wide and not specific to the Galaxy. But after the iOs mail client, the android mail client is clunky, unreadable, and confusing. It's not just bad, it's terrible--I can't emphasize this strongly enough. It doesn't sync often enough and the UI is impenetrable. I tried downloading another android mail client called K9 and I'm not impressed with it, either.
Any iPhone user will miss the ease and simplicity--both visual and intuitive--of the iOs mail client. This, in fact, may send me back to exchange the Galaxy for an iPhone 5. I check my email via my phone all the time.
Two, the Samsung OS takes up 8 gigabytes of space. Yes, 8. EIGHT. I purchased a 16 gig phone thinking I had 13 gigs of space, and to my surprise, NOPE. Only 8.
The bad: Three more issues.
One, there is too much stuff on the Galaxy. Too much software doing too many things. Hello, Samsung: SOMETIMES LESS IS MORE! Sheesh, you guys. Strip down this OS and your customers will be happier. It took me two days to figure out what I was going to use and what I wouldn't. Then another day to get rid of or hide the bloatware.
Two, the plastic casing feels cheap and flimsy in the hand. It just doesn't feel solid, and an iPhone user will miss the sturdy feeling in the hand. I walked by another AT&T store the other day so I checked out the HTC One, which has a really respectable aluminum casing.
Three, the settings are insanely disorganized. You will figure them out. It just won't be easy or intuitive. I am guessing that someone without the capacity for executive functioning in their brain designed the settings menus.
Here's what is neither positive or negative: so far I haven't noticed any extra flexibility from being in the android environment. It's just different.
Now, the good. There are a lot of good features.
One, the camera is fantastic. Awesome, actually--dazzling. Wish I used it more!
Two, customizing ringtones is easy and built-in. This is a great feature for me, because I like to customize ringtones. I like to know who is calling me so I can decide whether or not to pick up. I am actually trying to train people to text me as a first contact. At least 50% of all phone conversations can be conducted more efficiently via text. So I want to know who's calling, and for that I need specific ringtones. I always pick-up for my daughter's school, for example.
Three, customizing the lock and home screens is easy and fun. But you do have to get rid of some of that terrible bloatware that Samsung features--like Flipboard.
Four, air wave is kinda cool. I do like being able to wave my hand over the phone and see the time, date, and my unread email count. Nice feature.
The great.
One, the screen is fantastic. You have to see it to believe it. That big, bright screen makes reading texts easy. It makes looking at anything easy.
Two, I like the bigger size of the phone. I would have liked Apple to make an iPhone that was the same size. Really, I would have.
I have a few more days left to exchange the phone for a $35 restocking fee. In the end, it may just come down to that terrible android email interface--I don't know if I can live with it.
But the Samsung Galaxy S4 does feature many cool, worthwhile features.
Comments
Latest HuffPo Blog: THE MASTERY OF ISADORA DUNCAN
May 12, 2013 06:14
| Permalink
I was fortunate to be invited to a dress rehearsal for THE MARCHES! The 136th Birthday of Isadora Duncan. It was a transporting experience. I posted a blog article about it on the Huffington Post. ENJOY!
A really fun Netgalley Review
May 07, 2013 10:14
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This one made me giggle. I envisioned the reader tilting her head... I do love the thought of this novel being "strangely addicting"!!
*****
*****
Title: BOOK REVIEW...The Love of My (Other) Life by Traci L. Slatton
Link: http://kawehisbookblog.blogspot.com/2013/05/book-reviewthe-love-of-my-other-life-by.html
Outlet: Kawehi's Book Blog
Link: http://kawehisbookblog.blogspot.com/2013/05/book-reviewthe-love-of-my-other-life-by.html
Outlet: Kawehi's Book Blog
Notes:
Full Text: I'll be the first to admit, it was the book cover that caught my attention! lol
Although the story is a little strange and includes no erotic elements like one would think, the plot-line was original and the characters were interesting.
I found myself reading "The Love of My (Other) Life" with my head tilted upside down to the side with an eyebrow quirked upward since that's literally how I felt while reading it.
I don't believe it will be everyone's cup of tea but I do believe that it will have your attention to the last page. It's that strangely addicting and intriguing! haha
Although the story is a little strange and includes no erotic elements like one would think, the plot-line was original and the characters were interesting.
I found myself reading "The Love of My (Other) Life" with my head tilted upside down to the side with an eyebrow quirked upward since that's literally how I felt while reading it.
I don't believe it will be everyone's cup of tea but I do believe that it will have your attention to the last page. It's that strangely addicting and intriguing! haha
---
Fun new reviews on Netgalley
May 03, 2013 08:39
| Permalink
Title: The Love of My (Other) Life
Link: http://www.redhotbooks.com/2013/04/review-love-of-my-other-life.html
Outlet: Red Hot Books
Link: http://www.redhotbooks.com/2013/04/review-love-of-my-other-life.html
Outlet: Red Hot Books
Notes:
Full Text:
Don’t be fooled by the cover, I have no idea what the cover even has to do with the story. When I first started reading I was reminded of “The Time Travelers Wife’ unfortunately for me I couldn’t even get past the first three chapters of that story; surprisingly this is a far sight better story to me. Tessa Barnum is a thirty something divorcee existing without a direction. Her co-op apartment is two years behind in fees and she’s working part-time hours with the elderly. The one passion, painting, she has was diminished by her increasing frustrations with her ex-husband and her art instructor. One day while minding her own business and running late to her part time job, Tessa is approached by a disheveled Brian Tennyson who claims that they’re married ‘in his world’.
There were a lot of things that I liked about this story but the pacing wasn’t one of them. I thought it was a bit slow in the beginning and Tessa was a bit too old to be so adrift in her life. Also, I’m not sure about that whole parallel universe concept thingie and the way it blends into a romance story because I’ve rarely seen that work out with an HEA that was in fact happy. What I did like was the witty dialogue and the development of the two main characters. Even though the story takes place in a few days, Slatton was able to develop a redeeming story that was interesting to read.
Tessa is quite the hot mess when we meet her – she’s got a good heart but she feels, rightfully so, beaten down by the choices she’s made. If that’s not enough to keep a good question herself in comes Brian with his far-fetched pick up line. It’s rightfully hard for Tessa to believe Brian’s fantastical story - if she had this review would not be so kind – and the way he makes her feel. He’s got her doing things that she wouldn’t normally do but there’s such an inherent connection there that leaves Tessa not knowing which way is up.
Brian on the other hand reminds me of Sheldon from ‘The Big Bang Theory’, just absolutely 100% nerd until he gets passionate about something then he becomes even nerdier. The tech talk was a little distracting until I just started treating it as if I’m watching ‘Star Trek’. The chemistry between Brian and Tessa was well done and even though the time frame was short the sex scenes were believable, especially when Brian ‘reads’ Tessa’s sexual state – that actually had me laughing out loud.
Happy Reading Folks!
****************
Title: Five Days, Four Hours and Twenty Two Minutes
Link: http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/508075709
Outlet: Goodreads
Link: http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/508075709
Outlet: Goodreads
Notes:
Full Text: "Five days, fours hours and 22 minutes" is the babbling of a stranger who suddenly appears everywhere in the messy life of Tessa. Twenty four hours is how long it took me to read this book. It is really that engrossing.
Tessa is creative, bohemian, empathetic and in trouble. Brian is floundering, unkempt, confusing and persistent.
You need not believe in parellel universes. You need not understand physics. You need not appreciate fine art. You need not ever been part of the audience at a classical music recital. If you relate to any of these, you may find yourself connecting to a specific moment, a mention, a scene. Perhaps a passing mention of Blue Oyster Cult is where your connecting moment comes. Whenever it happens, is up to individual experience. From the very beginning, this novel is filled with the promise of interesting entanglements, delightful moments and new favorite literary bits.
Tessa, in today's world, is struggling to keep her co-op after her husband has left her. She works for an elder-care program based out of a church. She has a strong affinity for the church which is suffering its' own struggles. Money would solve both of their problems. Tessa connects to her seniors but in particular we learn about her relationship with Mrs. Leibowitz. Tessa has another task of adversity. She is an artist who has been in a blocked period. She has been unable to paint.
She collides with Brian on the sidewalk. He does not make sense. He seems to be suffering delusions. And his mutterings of "five days, four hours and twenty two minutes" is doing nothing to convince her of his sincerity. But since meeting him she keeps seeing potential paintings as she goes through the day. Incredibly no matter where she goes, he is there. More outlandish than his perpetual appearances, is his claims to be part of a parellel universe where he and she are more than just casually acquainted.
Tessa is skeptical of everything Brian has to say. She is more concerned with paying her back co-op fees, helping the church and reclaiming her art. But beneath her cynicism. or perhaps parellel to it, is interest. How does he know about her birthmark? How is it that he feels to be more familiar than a threat? How is it that he has unlocked her passion for creating art?
There are wonderful moments where words open up Tessa to believing. When she is spending time with Mrs. Leibowitz, the elderly woman says "Doing what you want is the prerogative of the dying. Should be the prerogative of the living, too, but it doesn't always work out that way." Then Brian "You always think you have forever, then you find it over before you realize."
This is the story that answers "what if?" Every day we make choices. This is the magic mirror look at what would have happened if certain choices were made.
There are interesting secondary characters that fill the story and make it meatier. A flamboyant gallery owner, a professor's dedicat ed assistant, a best friend off on a yoga retreat, a hooker with a defined adam's apple, today's Dr. Brian Tennyson, a black market art dealer, a dedicated clergyman, Apple Geniuses and more cluster around Brian and Tessa. In the span of five days, four hours and twenty two minutes there is adventure, guilt, passion, soul searching, kindness, death, rebirth and so much more. It is your prerogative as the reader whether you believe in the possibility of paralel universes. You will learn a bit about physics in the process of reading this book; "reality is non-local, and once two particles have interacted, they're forever intimately connected in some way". You need not be familiar with New York City to appreciate the locations referred to throughout. However, if you are, then the marble plaza at Lincoln Center is a fabulous setting for Tessa and Brian to explore the what if conversation. I find part of the scene there to be silly but the background of the spirits of symphonies, operas and ballets is perfect.
I refuse to be any more detailed than this in my review. I care not to throw in spoilers. Read and experience it all for yourself.
This is a scrumptious look at love, art, science and the many pieces that link into a helix that sweeps the reader into its orbit.
Tessa is creative, bohemian, empathetic and in trouble. Brian is floundering, unkempt, confusing and persistent.
You need not believe in parellel universes. You need not understand physics. You need not appreciate fine art. You need not ever been part of the audience at a classical music recital. If you relate to any of these, you may find yourself connecting to a specific moment, a mention, a scene. Perhaps a passing mention of Blue Oyster Cult is where your connecting moment comes. Whenever it happens, is up to individual experience. From the very beginning, this novel is filled with the promise of interesting entanglements, delightful moments and new favorite literary bits.
Tessa, in today's world, is struggling to keep her co-op after her husband has left her. She works for an elder-care program based out of a church. She has a strong affinity for the church which is suffering its' own struggles. Money would solve both of their problems. Tessa connects to her seniors but in particular we learn about her relationship with Mrs. Leibowitz. Tessa has another task of adversity. She is an artist who has been in a blocked period. She has been unable to paint.
She collides with Brian on the sidewalk. He does not make sense. He seems to be suffering delusions. And his mutterings of "five days, four hours and twenty two minutes" is doing nothing to convince her of his sincerity. But since meeting him she keeps seeing potential paintings as she goes through the day. Incredibly no matter where she goes, he is there. More outlandish than his perpetual appearances, is his claims to be part of a parellel universe where he and she are more than just casually acquainted.
Tessa is skeptical of everything Brian has to say. She is more concerned with paying her back co-op fees, helping the church and reclaiming her art. But beneath her cynicism. or perhaps parellel to it, is interest. How does he know about her birthmark? How is it that he feels to be more familiar than a threat? How is it that he has unlocked her passion for creating art?
There are wonderful moments where words open up Tessa to believing. When she is spending time with Mrs. Leibowitz, the elderly woman says "Doing what you want is the prerogative of the dying. Should be the prerogative of the living, too, but it doesn't always work out that way." Then Brian "You always think you have forever, then you find it over before you realize."
This is the story that answers "what if?" Every day we make choices. This is the magic mirror look at what would have happened if certain choices were made.
There are interesting secondary characters that fill the story and make it meatier. A flamboyant gallery owner, a professor's dedicat ed assistant, a best friend off on a yoga retreat, a hooker with a defined adam's apple, today's Dr. Brian Tennyson, a black market art dealer, a dedicated clergyman, Apple Geniuses and more cluster around Brian and Tessa. In the span of five days, four hours and twenty two minutes there is adventure, guilt, passion, soul searching, kindness, death, rebirth and so much more. It is your prerogative as the reader whether you believe in the possibility of paralel universes. You will learn a bit about physics in the process of reading this book; "reality is non-local, and once two particles have interacted, they're forever intimately connected in some way". You need not be familiar with New York City to appreciate the locations referred to throughout. However, if you are, then the marble plaza at Lincoln Center is a fabulous setting for Tessa and Brian to explore the what if conversation. I find part of the scene there to be silly but the background of the spirits of symphonies, operas and ballets is perfect.
I refuse to be any more detailed than this in my review. I care not to throw in spoilers. Read and experience it all for yourself.
This is a scrumptious look at love, art, science and the many pieces that link into a helix that sweeps the reader into its orbit.
MASTERY by Robert Greene
May 01, 2013 09:30
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I love this topic, which is: how do people excel?
For me, it is translated as, how do I grow to be the best writer I can be? How do I perfect my craft? How do I exceed my own expectations? What is my personal best?
Personal best can be a broad concept, because mastery applies not just to craft but to personal integrity and the growth of the soul. How do I become a better human being, more loving and kinder and more peaceful and tolerant?
Very exciting questions!
I'm only in the middle of the book but it's so good that I decided to comment now, briefly. This is a well-written, insightful book that also manages to be entertaining and inspiring. I am happy to relate that Greene, in this book, exhibits soundness of values, as well.
If, like me, you are on a quest for mastery: check out this book for yourself.
For me, it is translated as, how do I grow to be the best writer I can be? How do I perfect my craft? How do I exceed my own expectations? What is my personal best?
Personal best can be a broad concept, because mastery applies not just to craft but to personal integrity and the growth of the soul. How do I become a better human being, more loving and kinder and more peaceful and tolerant?
Very exciting questions!
I'm only in the middle of the book but it's so good that I decided to comment now, briefly. This is a well-written, insightful book that also manages to be entertaining and inspiring. I am happy to relate that Greene, in this book, exhibits soundness of values, as well.
If, like me, you are on a quest for mastery: check out this book for yourself.
Great New Reviews
Apr 26, 2013 06:25
| Permalink
THE LOVE OF MY (OTHER) LIFE is up on Netgalley, and a reviewer just finished a review. Evidently she'll put it up on Goodreads, so I can post the link at that time. Here's what she said:
Title: The Love of My (Other) Life
Yesterday I also received word that The Midwest Book Review featured a review of COLD LIGHT on their MDB online magazine "MBR Bookwatch, Klausner's Shelf":
Title: The Love of My (Other) Life
Link:
Outlet:
Outlet:
Notes: Loved this book so much - I will be recommending this book to my good-reads, twitter and face book friends and family.
Full Text: At first look, I automatically thought this book was an erotic novel. With the naked bare bottom what else would I think?? What I found was that this was a beautiful story of love and loss with tremendous obstacles. Tessa is drawn to Brian even though she should be afraid of a guy that seems to be stalking her.
There is a magical almost destined feeling to this book.? The whole paralleled universe and how the two meet up and get to know each other kept me hooked throughout the book.
I loved the emotional ending and certainly enjoyed the quirky personalities and the syfi twists.� It made this book all the more interesting.� I have never heard of Traci L. Slatton but I will be looking forward to future reads.
There is a magical almost destined feeling to this book.? The whole paralleled universe and how the two meet up and get to know each other kept me hooked throughout the book.
I loved the emotional ending and certainly enjoyed the quirky personalities and the syfi twists.� It made this book all the more interesting.� I have never heard of Traci L. Slatton but I will be looking forward to future reads.
Yesterday I also received word that The Midwest Book Review featured a review of COLD LIGHT on their MDB online magazine "MBR Bookwatch, Klausner's Shelf":
The white miasma Mists burned except chlorophyll. Billions died when the Mists sucked out metals from humans and other beings on the planet during the Day. Arthur saved Emma, her young daughter Mandy and seven lost little orphans attached to her when he dispatched the Mists and brought them into his safe camp. Emma assumed her husband Haywood and their oldest daughter Beth are dead. She and Arthur become an entry while leading their settlement. However, Haywood found his wife and child in France and brought them home to Edmonton leaving Arthur behind despondent from his loss (see Fallen).
In Canada, raiders abduct Beth. She and Haywood search for their child. Clues lead them to Arthur and his townsfolk; all of whom are angry at their former first lady for leaving them. Still everyone joins in on the quest to find and rescue Beth; while Haywood and Arthur demand she choose between them as neither will voluntarily leave her. At the same time, everyone mentally prepares for the confrontation with the Mists knowing many of their loved ones will die in the final battle for survival.
The second exciting "After" post-apocalyptic thriller moves forward on two fronts: Emma's relationships and the anticipated suicidal Armageddon Mists war as Traci L. Slatton deftly blends both subplots into a superb dystopian tale through her quality cast. The triangle participants fear the repercussions on the young at a time when nightmares are prevalent yet none of them can leave. Readers will wonder who will quote Dickens' A Tale of Two Cities: "It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to, than I have ever known."
Harriet Klausner
Reviewer
Reviewer
HOW FUN!
LESSONS IN BECOMING MYSELF by Ellen Burstyn
Apr 22, 2013 07:02
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This summer I will enjoy a birthday milestone: I am turning 50. It’s a big, rich age, but also, for a woman, one with certain questions attached. Our culture tends to marginalize older women, so how do I squeeze all the juice from the ripeness of these years? Who are my role models for vibrant, successful, creative, sexy women in the fullness of their decades?
I was musing on this subject when I came across a mention of octogenarian actress Ellen Burstyn’s memoir. I admire Ms. Burstyn’s work, I think she’s beautiful, and I was intrigued enough to download the kindle version.
This thoughtful, well-written book contained some answers. It’s often thus in my life: if I hold something lightly but clearly in my consciousness, it will materialize. There’s a magic and mystery to consciousness that affects everything around it. In fact, this is one of the liet motif’s of Burstyn’s book.
I think we read memoirs and biographies with an eye toward the parallels with our own lives. We look for the similarities of background so can we be inspired with an expanded vision for our own future. We want to know what our own potential is, so we compare ourselves to those who’ve gone before. Burstyn is an actress and I am an author, but there was enough in common to cause me to pause and think deeply about where I’ve been, where I’m going, and who I’ve been and am going to be.
For me, the first point of resonance was familial. I hold a deep empathy with Burstyn’s accounts of her mother. It wasn’t my mother who beat me, it was my father, but my mother was a cold-hearted person who dedicated herself to invalidating and dimunizing me at every turn. Anyone who’s experienced that knows the fullness of it.
I understood exactly what Burstyn meant when she described herself as looking at her mother and thinking “I don’t want to be like that.” It’s a particular kind of bone-deep dislike, and a kind of grief that must be integrated, and ultimately transcended, in order to accept and to love oneself as a woman.
My mother was a heavy smoker and I never looked at her without seeing her as surrounded by a cloud of poison.
Oddly enough, my grandmother, who played poker and sewed quilts and had to live on the wagon after decades as a falling-down, black-out drunk alcoholic, was at least as heavy a smoker, but I never perceived her the same way. Perhaps that was because she offered me a deep love and kindness that sustained me.
Her love was unstintingly returned. After all, love isn’t about perfectionism. In fact, the two are opposites, I think.
But thankfulness and love are close kin. Indeed, I owe my grandmother a debt of gratitude. It was she who suggested that I wasn’t trapped by my family of origin. One day, when I was 6, my father beat me to the point that my tough old bird of a granny went into another room to cry. When the episode was over, I went to check on her.
“When you grow up, you can leave these people far behind and never come back, Traci,” Granny said.
I don’t remember this moment specifically. Granny told me about it shortly before she died. Everything in me ached with truth and remembrance, though I couldn’t pull up the file in my brain.
Burstyn talks about leaving home on the day she was 18: “There was no force on earth that could have stopped me.” I get that. I headed out when I was 17, my acceptance from Yale in hand. Burstyn yearned to see the world, and that yearning still fills me all the way into my toenails.
Burstyn had her beauty, pluck, and innate intelligence to rely on, while I had a talent for school work. She became a model and actress while I went to college and then to graduate school. I burned with the longing to write books. It’s that longing that has led me through my life.
Burstyn made some interesting and regrettable choices for mates along the way, as I have. She writes about her third husband stalking her for years, threatening to kill her. My heart wrung with understanding. My former husband has pursued me via the legal system, suing me repeatedly, losing, and then hiring ever more expensive attorneys with ever fiercer reputations, until the last time in court, when he showed up with an entourage of attorneys said to be some of the meanest and costliest in the city.
The judge dismissed his suit against me, but I wonder if my ex’s blood lust is assuaged. One therapist told me, “If he’d had a different background, he would have picked up a gun. Given where he comes from, he’s firing his lawyers at you.”
Burstyn’s in-laws blamed her and her success and treated her badly, something else I well understand. I haven’t been as successful as Burstyn but there’s no question that my ex’s family lives in narcissistic distortion around the matter of our failed relationship.
Burstyn has done a lot of meticulous work on herself and she’s able to ask herself the penetrating questions: what in me allowed me to marry this unbalanced man? How is he carrying my shadow?
For me, there’s no question that the sneering condescension with which my ex treated me for the 20 years of our relationship, and the dozen years since it ended, was a replay of my mother’s contempt for me. His desire to annihilate me since we parted is a reiteration both of his pathological desire to control me, and of my rageful father’s intentions. The way my ex is treating me now is not different in kind from the way he always treated me—it is different by degree.
I chose a man like that because of my own wounding. If I had healed myself earlier, I would not have made that choice. Repetition compulsion is a bitch.
I have the sense that Burstyn was able to use her fear and sorrow over her ex-husband in her craft as an actress. As an author, I use my experiences in my own writing, so I’ve found a way to be grateful for almost everything I’ve been through. I am currently working on a novel set during WW2, and my former husband’s unbounded aggression toward me, and his absolute certainty that he is justified in it, has given me my prototype for the Nazi’s—in particular Josef Goebbels.
Hannah Arendt has said that evil is banal, but I disagree. I think that evil feels itself to be justified in its actions. I do marvel at the way my former husband feels justified in his behavior.
Artists mine their own lives for their creations. In this way, the suffering I’ve endured has given me ample material. Life deals everyone some shitty cards. The question is, how do we play those cards? How do we make our hand meaningful?
The game isn’t about wallowing, it’s about redemption.
I enjoyed reading about Burstyn’s evolution as an actor, her education by Lee Strasberg, and her integrity toward her craft. I can relate to that, as well. At Yale and at Columbia, I was taught by exceptional writers and thinkers. Then I had to go out and apply what I learned, and to work with it every single day. I will continue to work on my craft until the day they pry the keyboard out from under my stiff, lifeless fingers. I have a feeling that Burstyn will be plying and perfecting her path until she is literally unable to walk onstage. I admire that.
Hard work, integrity, and gratitude aren’t the only paths to redemption. There’s also the exploration of consciousness. Burstyn writes movingly of her forays into the metaphysical realm. If you open yourself, the universe—or God, “the Force,” the spirit of all that is—will speak to you in direct, palpable, and wondrous ways.
Burstyn’s film Resurrection arose from her inquiries into the numinous, and, similarly, I attended a healing school and spent 10 years as a hands-on healer, with a practice. I still have a daily practice of yoga and a nurturing spiritual life of prayer and meditation. Though, to be sure, I spend as much time arguing with God and yelling at God as I do praying.
When I soften and relax into reverence, I can feel the sweet, loving, healing humor of the Divine—like the warmest smile imaginable, hugging my entire being.
I liked what Burstyn had to say about the divine feminine, and about women owning both their sexuality and their spirituality. I’ve been thinking a lot about this concept lately. We are creatures of spirit inhabiting bodies of flesh, and we must honor both our flesh and our soul. Denying spirit, as scientific materialists have done, or denying flesh, as so many religions have done, can only lead to imbalance, distortion, and disease—on both the personal and transpersonal levels.
It’s not our purity that will save us, it’s our richness.
I affirm both my eros and my sanctity.
A few notes that are more critical in nature. For one, it’s hard for me to understand Burstyn’s embrace of Islam, a religion so harshly patriarchal as to ruthlessly enslave women. She mentions Sufism as a way to explore the universal truths contained in all religions, but I couldn’t help but wonder if it was about her absent father. Did she gravitate toward male-deifying Islam as a way to fill her own “father” void?
Then again, I chose Judaism, so some people will discount my question purely on the basis of the ancient schism between Judaism and Islam.
My personal experience with Islam was taking Arabic at Yale. I was the only woman in the class, and the unspoken, underlying misogyny of the class was so intense that I rarely attended. I redeemed my grade only by doing an excellent final project: a translation from Scheherazade’s One Thousand and One Nights. With her infinite story-telling creativity, she is one of my beloved archetypes. Scheherazade was the reason I took the language—despite the contempt of my male classmates.
Remember, I have a high tolerance for contempt, because of my childhood.
Second, I was saddened to read of Burstyn’s regular use of recreational drugs. I suppose I stand practically alone of my generation in my stance that recreational drugs are bad, but I’ve seen lives destroyed by pot and other drugs. I do not share the current cultural embrace of marijuana. I think marijuana is destroying America and our future prosperity and success.
In particular, I wish Hollywood didn’t insist that drugs are cool. Is Hollywood so lacking in imagination that it can’t find another way to show that characters are hip and independent than to show them smoking pot?
Substance abuse just isn’t copacetic. Pot is not a success strategy, no matter how many movies and TV shows say otherwise.
Burstyn writes of finally giving up her addictions, as she continued to deepen her schooling in becoming who she is.
Third, Burstyn mentions that the current generation of actors doesn’t work as hard as her generation did. I have to say I agree with her. The young actors I know never talk about their craft. They talk about deserving to be rich and famous.
This generation of American kids is, largely, an entitled lot. They think everything should be handed to them. It’s sad. This isn’t true of every kid, of course. My lovely step-daughter, who is headed to med school, works with admirable zeal and dedication far into the night. But entitlement, lack of personal responsibility, and disrespectfulness do seem, generally, to characterize American youth—as I see with my two beautiful, lovable older daughters, who are, despite my love for them, disappointments to me.
I must bear some of the responsibility for their character flaws. I did the best I could as a mother, but it was difficult in the face of my ex-husband’s antics.
Life will, sooner or later, deal them some harsh truths. This is inevitable. I’m curious to see how they’ll respond. I pray for them that they’ll give up their certainty of being better-than and entitled. I pray that they will open up into humility and wonder. I hope for them that their education in becoming themselves will draw them forth into what is larger than their own small, insistent egos.
I hope for that for all of us.
It has been a sad lesson in detachment for me to let them go explore their narcissism.
So here I am, 49 and 9 months, trembling on the brink of 50, the mother of three daughters and a step-daughter, the author of 8 completed books with 2 more in the pipeline and several in the note-taking stage, a wife, an ex-wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend, a lover, a recovering healer, a dedicated yogi, an inveterate traveller, still burning to write books.
Who am I becoming over the next three decades?
What magic will consciousness wreak for me?
What parts of myself will I meet again, as if for the first time?
I don’t have the answers to these questions yet, but I’m grateful for Ellen Burstyn’s Lessons in Becoming Myself (New York: Riverhead Books, 2006), which is a kind of guidebook by a fellow traveller who is further along the journey.
Guest Post from Renowned Astrologer LYNN BELL: The Archetype of War, April 2013
Apr 21, 2013 09:56
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Renowned astrologer and author of 3 books LYNN BELL sent me this thoughtful essay this morning, and then graciously gave permission for me to post it here as a guest post.
Lynn Bell is American by birth but lives in Paris and teaches at the Centre for Psychological Astrology in London. She frequently lectures and teaches for groups in England, Germany, Norway, Austria, France and Mexico, including The Faculty Summer School at Oxford, The London School of Astrology, Agape in Paris and RAH in France.
Lynn is part of the core faculty for Wisdom University's New Chartres School, and has taught courses for Caroline Myss and her CMED Institute in Chicago and at the Omega Institute in New York. Her articles have appeared in "The Mountain Astrologer," "Apollon", "Meridian", and many other publications.
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Lynn Bell is American by birth but lives in Paris and teaches at the Centre for Psychological Astrology in London. She frequently lectures and teaches for groups in England, Germany, Norway, Austria, France and Mexico, including The Faculty Summer School at Oxford, The London School of Astrology, Agape in Paris and RAH in France.
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The Archetype of War and After, April 2013
Lynn Bell
An iconic American city has been locked down, after explosive terror ripped through the lives of ordinary Americans. Both intentional violence and toxic mayhem erupted with the space of a week, with a massive accidental explosion in Texas, days after bombs ripped through a crowd of onlookers at the marathon. Massive earthquakes occurred on the border between Pakistan and Afghanistan, and in Sichuan province, China.
We have all felt the potent eruption of Mars in the collective psyche. The Sun conjuncts Mars, the traditional god of war, every two years. Each conjunction happens in different signs, where it awakens both aggression and great courage. For the first time since spring of 1981, the conjunction happened in Aries, a sign where Mars has great power. Fiery, impulsive, courageous and active, the coming together of Sun and Mars in this sign brings great heat, sudden danger, and often calls up the presence of men in uniform, the police, soldiers, and emergency responders who embody Mars in our society. A veritable war machine was mobilized in response to the carnage created by bombs, shooting and robbery.
In 1981 it was marked by the attempted assassination of President Reagan, with a corresponding shock to the national psyche. Days later there were massive riots in Brixton, London, as well military coups and massacres/ in other parts of the world, particularly Guatemala and El Salvador. An explosion and fire in a coal mine added natural disaster to the political events.
The previous conjunction in 1934 saw John Dillinger gunned down in front of a Chicago movie theater, as Bonnie and Clyde approached the end their wild ride. More significantly, both Germany and Japan where in a phase of heightened militarization, Japan had invaded and annexed Manchuria just weeks before. A massive fire with great loss of life, and property, swept through Hakodate in Hokkaido, japan.
Each of these conjunctions occurs within a backdrop of larger cycles, each has the force to ignite repression or freedom. The adrenaline we felt watching events, can serve to reawaken shock and lockdown in our psyches, well beyond the scope of recent events. Over the next weeks Mars will oppose repressive Saturn, and it is essential to be aware of the temptation to overreact, to over-militarize. Mars also awakens inner courage, quiet triumph. It motivates the athletes and wounded who must overcome adversity, it reawakens the life force in those who have carried heavy burdens, It was expressed in the joy of the crowds who celebrated the end of a dangerous time in their city, applauding the outcome, coming together to affirm the return of their lives to some semblance of normality. The eclipse cycle in May, asks us to let go, to empty ourselves of dark fantasies, and long frozen terrors.
In some ways the violent energy of the past week can also be seen as a reaction to
the frustrating celestial configurations of recent months. Political deadlock in the US is a near constant. The economy has moved forward and slipped back, while in Europe a frozen spring contributed to a possible triple dip recession in Britain, and the Euro was once again under threat from a financial meltdown in Cyprus. These events are all part of a much larger context, the ongoing square between Pluto and Uranus, ( 2010-2017 although some astrologers will give an even greater time frame. )
Much is being decided at this time as the old social forms fail and a new model is yet to be born. The early part of 2013 has been marked by a series of interlocking aspects that are best described by their ability to hold things back. The resulting tension and discomfort created by these misfit aspects, the quincunxes, often enough ends with a dramatic and unpredictable resolution. As Mars moved into these strong configurations and out again it acted as a trigger for energies that have been pent up for months, bound in struggle between light and dark. The ancient Greeks didn’t care much for Ares, their name for the god, but the recognized the state that descended on the feel of battle as a divine possession. Mars is the ‘breaker of walls’ and any logjam can be burst apart by its arrival. not always with the expected results. The force of Mars can be difficult to control.
Mars, has been in powerful ascendance since the last new Moon on April 9th, when five planets came together in the fiery sign of Aries. Jupiter began to move out of these configurations at the same time. Over the next days, even though Mars has changed signs for quieter Taurus, it continues to form aspects with a high degree of tension. Perhaps most importantly for each of us, we are asked to move from fear to an affirmation of life. We need not to hold on to fantasies of hatred or revenge. In doing so we can benefit from a powerful opening that will come with a celestial Grand Trine in early summer.
Caroline Myss and Lynn Bell will be teaching an intensive in Chicago, October 3rd to 6th, 2013
Sacred Contracts and Astrology: How Changes in the Cosmos Influence The Significant Crossroads and Opportunities of Your Life
BlogtalkRadio: Lillian Brummet's Conscious Discussions
Apr 04, 2013 02:23
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Here are Sabin Howard and me talking about the world of art...
Listen to internet radio with Lillian Brummet on Blog Talk Radio
Blogtalk Radio interview on Lillian Brummet's CONSCIOUS DISCUSSIONS 4/4 @ 1:00 pm EDT
Apr 02, 2013 05:25
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Please join my husband classical figurative sculptor SABIN HOWARD and me for a blogtalk radio interview hosted by writer and media guru LILLIAN BRUMMET.
Tune in at 1:00 pm EDT on Thursday April 4.
Call in to ask questions or comment: (646) 478-4758
Tune in at 1:00 pm EDT on Thursday April 4.
Call in to ask questions or comment: (646) 478-4758